Tonight.. actually wan to go her hse for the class de.. but last min she told me working late.. gotta teach ah dai.. here i sad again.. but nvm.. but then.. still got the urge to go out.. coz very sad.. very bored.. got nth to do.. so take my bike and go cycle.. then soon bian go distribute flyers.. but actually is go serganoon to see DeaR.. so stupid rite.. haha..
On the way there was truly a gloomy journey.. i almost got hit by car.. horned by bus.. and almost lost control of my front wheel.. gosh.. what am i doing.. haiz.. but lucky under god's bless.. im alright.. cried twice on the way.. thinking of my skin i just don feel like doing anything.. been 2-3 days. no sign of recovery.. really feel like dying.. its so itchy.. go ugly.. so disgusting after a bathe.. the skin just drop off and the red blood wounds and come out.. my bed are stained wif blood.. blood.. i guess no one can feel how bitter i am now.. i got no one to turn to.. no friends to talk to.. DeaR working these 2 days.. full shift somemore.. why still work? everytime say pei me.. when u come and pei me everytime? when i need u where are u? i need a shoulder.. but theres none for me there.. im sad.. my life is so sad.. full of sadness.. theres rarely a few days im happy.. barely..
finally reached serganoon.. whoa.. long time no see de place.. a little bit of miss there.. haha.. wanted to find DeaR.. but held back.. dunno why.. then i straight away go fen flyers.. ah.. yongjia hse there so easy.. all the letter boxes super old one.. hehe.. then i also lazy to go upstairs and fen.. then i just fen the letter boxes.. hehe..
Within minutes i finished.. shiok.. then got this super big duper urge to see DeaR.. miss her a lot.. wan to see her.. wan to baobao her.. these few days really hard to live without see her.. haha.. vroommmmmmmm.. here i gooooooo to her shop...!
Ah! saw her.. so happy.. green shirt wif blue jeans.. so cute.. hehe.. but i stood outside the shop waiting for her to see me.. but to my dismay.. after standing there for 45mins.. she never see me.. sad.. i just ride my bike and go.. but still happy.. =)
Reached home.. bathed.. on the phone wif her.. suddenly sadness engulfed me again.. shes going work this week and next week again.. again and again.. teaching the newcomer ah dai.. her cousin.. she say shes not working.. this week and next week de.. another lie.. why again? no one in the shop can teach him meh? only my DeaR.. if dai needs her then i how? i dying for her already.. from the start of my holiday i asking her.. when u not working? always tell me maybe last week of the holiday or 2 weeks before.. i guess its all crap now.. it may seems that i can live without u.. but the truth is.. i can't live a single day without ur existence.. maybe there are days i wan to be alone myself.. but i am more looking forwards to the days wif u..
Guess these days i really need her.. really.. but i am still left alone.. facing the problem myself.. after telling her that im really sad over my skin.. still remember was last night that i told her that i din wan to see her coz of my skin.. then she say i always keep to myself.. now she know le.. but she still go work today.. sometimes think that.. am i important to her? of coz she will say yes.. but in this case.. i really need her a lot today.. but she was not there.. she just dunno how sad i am..
9:47 PM LeX
Profile
Name: LeX
Age: 19 Male
School: Stamford Primary School/St Gabriel Secondary School/Nanyang Poly
Birthday: 10 May 1987
Horoscope: Taurus
Location: South of Singapore
Email: poohks10@hotmail.com
